Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, And  A Feeling
by KhaleesiLunae
Summary: It's after the Apocalypse. Castiel has found himself irrevocably changed, and without a purpose. Follow him, Sam, And Dean as they search for what Castiel wants most; Love.     Of course, what's an adventure without a few ... incidents?
1. Confessions, And A New Hunt

Real title is "Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, Grey Eyes, And … A Feeling" Unfortunately, it doesn't fit.

**Disclaimer:** All things Supernatural, sadly, do not belong to me. It belongs to those geniuses who invented it and continue to amaze me with their prowess of creativity, and _very_ good choice in attractive actors.. Castiel doesn't belong to me either. Heartbreakingly. Oh how I wish I could just hide him away and keep him with me always… Aunnah is all my idea. Yes, taken slightly from Anna, but honestly? She's way better than idiotic Anna.

**Rating:** T  
-Mild Violence  
-Cussing  
-Slight Suggestive Themes

_**Summary: **__Alright! So, this Fan-Fict takes place after the Apocalypse. Of course Sam and Dean and Castiel stopped the world from exploding! It's a few years after, and all is well again; people living normal lives, people dying normal deaths, etc etc. How did this all happen you ask? Well, now that isn't important here! They just did. End of story. Did you really expect anything less?  
Sam is going back to school and trying to find love again; hell, he even has his Soul back!  
Dean is settling down with his fiancé and child. Finally.  
And Castiel…. Well, Castiel… Here, why don't you just read…_

* * *

He sat at the bar counter with Sam and Dean. They were having a get together. One of their sporadic, 'let's-get-the-team-back-together-for-a-party' ideas. It was all fine and well.

For Sam and Dean. They like bars. They like loud places. They like bar nuts.

I don't. I like quiet. I like reflection. It is really a wonderful thing to see the boys again. After everything we have been through.

Yet…..

The two of them have been able to move on. And I haven't.

Why?

Well, I wish I knew. I ask myself that every moment.

I have no Father anymore. My brothers and sisters are split once again. I have no purpose. I am alone, confused within this vessel.

This vessel….

Poor Jimmy…. He had to watch. He was there, speaking with me, when we came to his house to visit. I wanted him to see his family, safe and sound.

What we found was…. Horror. A woman in the kitchen, throat slit.

Jimmy's wife.

A young girl, bruises around her neck in her bed.

Jimmy's daughter.

The stench of sulfur was all around the house.

Jimmy saw this as I did. And Jimmy told me then, right then that he couldn't take it anymore. That he wouldn't ask politely any longer; he was commanding me to leave his body, let him be.

I was prepared to leave him, let him grieve in his own body. That I would find a temporary Vessel, come back to help him when he was ready. He had done so much for me in the years we had been together. He deserved what little I could offer him. But the moment I loosed control, I blacked out.

A re-awoke. Alone. Completely, and utterly alone. Jimmy had left _me. _His Soul had gone to Heaven.

It made me sad that Jimmy had left, and on such horrific terms. But now he was with his family, once and for all.

And I didn't need to share a body with anyone.

It was all mine.

A disconcerting thought at first. Awkward. But I got used to it over time.

That was eight years ago, during the Apocalypse. But now that's over.

I'm useless. I have nothing I need to do, and nothing I can do. I fit no where in this world of Humans. Yes, I am still an Angel. But an Angel with their own body.

I know not what to do with myself.

Sam has gone back to school, wanting to be a lawyer. Dean has gone to live with Lisa, his girlfriend – excuse me, now _fiancé_ - and his son, Ben.

Dean. A father. I couldn't believe it. But I am proud of him.

As for me…. The past four years I have done… Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I wander. I've been everywhere in the world now. Seen everything.

I have made no new friends. I don't drink, except when I'm with Sam and Dean. I've never indulged in drugs or women.

Women….

This body has urges, thoughts that are not my own. I think one thing, it says another. It's very uncomfortable, and bewildering. I have asked Dean what it all means several times. He has explained, and told me I need to "Loose that shiny 'V' card."

"'V' Card"? I do not understand. I have no such card in my wallet. I have looked, several times. And I have never been given one. Should I find a 'V' Card? Purchase it? And why would I want to loose it once I had it? I asked Sam if he could find one for me, and he just laughed.

I do believe I have been hoodwinked by Dean yet again.

But this matter is not a laughing one! I am so baffled, and uncomfortable.

_What am I to do?_

* * *

"Cas? Cas man, wake up. Snap out of your internal conversation with yourself. It's kinda creepy, seeing you staring, and looking into the distance."

I 'snapped' out of my reverie. Looking at Dean levelly I said, "Yes Dean? Can I help you with something?"

Dean looked around, and laughed once. "No Cas, but you were creepin' me out with that whole, 'Distant Angel' look. Somethin' wrong? I mean, usually you're quiet, but not this quiet. And you've got the whole, 'I-hate-my-life-but-I-won't-say-anything-face' on. What's up man?"

Sam sighed, and turned towards me. "What Dean means is, are you alright Cas? Ever since the end of the Apocalypse, you've been really… Introvert. More than usual. Distracted, and unhappy. What's wrong?"

I sighed, and looked unseeingly into the case of alcohol above the bar.

"Nothing."

Sam and Dean looked towards one another, and shook their heads at the same time. In unison, they said, "Women."

The boys got off their stools and stood, each on one side of me.

"So what is it Cas? You finally take that leap? It was a hooker, wasn't it? Now you feel guilty? Awww Cas, don't feel guilty! It's a job for those women! You were just being a good Samaritan and providing a lady of the night with some – "

"No Dean, I did not, 'Take that leap', as you say. I don't want to. And even if I did, I wouldn't know how. Or even what I'm doing. How to start, what to say, who to – "

I stopped, ground my jaw, and downed a shot of whisky.

What is that, thirty tonight? No matter. I still have the metabolism of an Angel. Hasn't affected me in the slightest. Unfortunately.

The brothers passed a knowing look over Castiel's shoulders.

Sam leaned over the counter, talking to him. "Look Cas, I know you used to be an full Angel and all, but, well, you're a guy, sorta now. Guys need to – do certain things."

"Like women." Dean added, grinning at Castiel.

I looked blankly at him till Dean's grin slid off his face. "Geez, tryin' to help a guy and you get the 'Blank-Angel-Death-Glare'…" He muttered, looking away.

Sam rolled his eyes and said gently, "What Dean means, in a more tactful way, is that you are pretty much human now Cas. And human guys need – certain – things. You've been in this body, what? Eight years now? That's a long time for a guy not to – well, you know."

I looked at Sam, blankness across my face, then back over the bar.

I sighed. Both brothers automatically leaned in, ready to hear what I was going to say.

I cleared my throat, and looked away, feeling warmth in my cheeks. Such an odd reaction human bodies have. I stared straight ahead, wanting to get this off my chest. I needed help. I wasn't really human, I never had been. Everything about these bodies confused me. And I no longer had Jimmy to direct me, tell me what to do.

"I – I want….. Something. I want – What you have." I swiveled in my stool to face Dean. "I want what you have." I repeated, my face stoic.

Dean's eyebrows shot up. "Me? What I ha- Cas. I have to get up at six in the morning. _Six_, Cas. I have to go to a _real_ job, work hours for a little money, then go to a house that sucks it up like a spongee. I have a woman who has been berating me to tie the knot. I'm getting married, Cas. Do you understand how scary that word is to most men?" Dean was looking at me seriously, worry in his eyes, his mouth set in a grim line. "Cas, I love that woman. Oh Hell do I love her. Good thing too, only thing that's keeping tethered, making me become all, 'Nine-To-Fiver-Stick-Up-His-Protective-Ass' guy. I have to drive a kid to school, all his practices. I have to explain stuff to him. Teenage stuff." Dean turned away, despair written on his face, hands in his hair. "Cas. I don't do teen stuff. All that angst and pimples and hormones." He shuddered. "I can't take it. Not again. And my 'beloved', oh, now she's getting' all goo-goo eyed, talkin' about _more_ kids, _more_ money, a bigger house, a better car! Cas! It's impossible for a man to keep up with this!" He pointed a finger at me. "You stay outa this kinda thing before it swallows you up. Because you know what the worst part is?" He glanced around, then dropped his voice low. "I. Like. It. If someone told me I could be free, and drift around again, I'd tell them to move along, 'cuz I got what I need right at home. Hell Cas, I'm so far in it, I'd like to think I could – "

I cleared my throat, looking away, brow furrowing. "Dean. As lovely as that story is, it's not helping me right now."

Sam looked at Dean accusingly, and Dean sat, stunned for a moment. His eyes widened, and he realized what he had done.

"Oh. Shit Cas, sorry man. When I start talkin' 'bout them…" He gave a little chuckle. "Can't help it, man."

I sighed heavily, rolling the empty glass betwixt my fingers.

"I want that Dean. More than you can imagine. But no woman would want me that way… And I don't even know how to meet a woman, how to tell if she's 'the one', how to do – anything around them." I sighed heavier, twirling the glass faster and faster. "I get so nervous, and don't know what to say. I – 'freeze up' – as you would say. And never have I looked into the eyes of a woman, and felt that – that, belonging – all you humans talk about. How can I find her? Even just to know someone is there for me… Just to talk to her… I could figure out the rest later." I looked betwixt the boys. "What is this, this intense need and longing in me? I can't… Understand…" I looked down at my hands, practically human hands, and sighed once again.

Sam smiled and said softly, "Love, Cas. You want love."

Dean looked from me, to Sam, and back again, eyes wide with disbelief.

"Seriously Cas? You want to _be with a girl_?"

I scowled at him. "Dean. I am not looking just for carnal pleasures. I am looking for someone to give me a purpose, someone to look at me and say I am their world… I don't understand why. But it is something I want dearly."

Dean rolled his eyes and said, "Oh alright. Let me just put up a picture of you on . You should get tons of hits Cas!" He chuckled at himself, and Sam sighed.

I gave him a brief glare, then went back to staring blankly.

Sam shifted a bit, and said carefully, "If you really want this Cas, we'll help you. In all honesty. We'll travel for a while with you, looking for the right one." He gave me a clap on the back. "It'll be just like old times! The three of us, in the Impala, searching for something, everything. It'll be great." He laughed aloud, then spread his hands in the air, making an imaginary canvas in front of us. "Picture this: We drive. We have a familiar mission in mind; hunt something. What, we don't know. We just know we gotta find it, and fast. Going all over the country, hunting down a chic for an Angel; what could be more fun?" He beamed at me.

Dean abruptly stopped laughing, and looked betwixt the two of us. "Oh Sam you aren't serious are you?"

I looked away, feeling hallow in my stomach.

Of course Dean wouldn't want to go… And where would I even start?

Sam glared at Dean, and said slowly, as if speaking to a child, "Dean, Castiel gave up _everything_ for us. The least we can do is help him when he needs us most. So shut up, get home, explain, and pack. We are leaving tomorrow morning."

Dean looked back at us, dumbstruck. "Sam!" He exclaimed. "I have a job now! A fiancé! A kid! I can't just up and leave for weeks on end on last minute notice! I gotta leave notes, tell my boss, warn the kid, stock up on-"

He stopped, horror drawing on his face. "Shit. I've turned into an old man!" He turned quickly to Sam and I. "Oh I'm comin' now. No way am I growing old before my time. I gotta get home and let the gal down easily." He grimaced briefly. "This should be fun…" He muttered. He pulled out his mobile phone, and glanced at us. "Be ready first thing tomorrow. I'm driving. We'll discuss tactics in the car." He gave a little wave, putting the small device to his ear, walking out of the bar.

I turned to Sam, worry on my face. "Sam. You don't need to do this. I'm sure I can-"

He cut me off, impatiently waving a hand. "No Cas, I insist. We are gonna do this for you. _You_ need _us_ for once." He grinned, and started walking out of the bar. "First thing tomorrow Cas! Don't forget! And there's no backing out of this one! Just like old times!" he called out, and left the establishment.

I sighed, looking back down on the bar counter.

_Why am I doing this?  
_

* * *

I awoke, gasping for breath. I sat up, rubbing the last bits of sleep and dream that clung to my lids.

That same dream. I had it again.

The woman hidden in darkness. I couldn't see her face. I could not tell if I recognized her.

But I felt it.

That feeling Sam spoke of.

Love. An overwhelming amount of Love.

Love for this shadowed woman. I heard her laugh, felt her smile. She wrapped me in her elegant limbs, holding me close to her shocking warmth.

My heart nearly burst from the amount of emotion I felt for this creature.

Then I felt her face coming closer to mine. She smiled gently; I could feel it. I could feel her blush, her quickening breath. She leaned closer still. My heart stopped. And…

And I woke. Gasping for her scent, searching the cold sheets unknowingly for her.

Finding nothing, no trace of the dream, the hollowness returned, along with the longing and yearning.

Dreams. What a bittersweet thing I have discovered. Electrifying, emotion-filled, heart-warming; when they were playing out. After they passed? Emptiness, loneliness, hopelessness; wanting nothing more than to live within my fantasies, but knowing it will never happen. I groaned frustrated, running my hands through my bed-hair. I needed to find this woman. I haven't even met her outside of my mind, and I was going insane after her.

How do I even have these dreams you may ask? Am I not an Angel, you ask, who needs only survive on Faith? Well, I used to be. Now I'm…. I don't know what. I do need to sleep. Consume food and liquid too. All that is necessary for human, I must do also. Yet, not at the extent humans must. I sleep but a couple hours every day, and am rested. I drink but a glass of water, consume one meal, and I am filled.

I can still perform most of my "Angel Tricks" as Dean puts it.

Just one "trick" I cannot perform.

I cannot go to Heaven.

I know not what I am. A strange combination of both obviously. But how? It has never happened before. No stories have ever described this. Who am I to follow now? How long will I live? Can I-

My wonderings are cut short by the buzzing beside me.

I look around, puzzled by the noise. My bleary eyes focus, searching my room for the source. Seeing my bed side table, I recognize the source of buzzing.

It is my cellular device.

I squint at the tiny screen, and read Sam's name upon it. Sighing, I bring it to my face.

"How do you answer it again?" I mumble. "This but – No no, this one?"

_*Click*_

"Sam?"

"Castiel! You sound awake! Great! Alright, come on over to our motel – you know the one – and meet us at the Impala. ASAP Cas! Oh, and bring some changes of clothes, will ya? Can't have you wearing that same thing all the time!"

I listened to Sam's voice coming from the device. It was so muffle and garbled, I squinted to hear past the excess noises. Hearing his last comment, I looked towards my rumpled clothes on the floor. Tan trench coat, white button up, black slacks, black dress shoes, and a navy blue wrinkled tie. What I've always worn, every day since inhabiting Jimmy for my Vessel.

I frowned. Why would I need different clothes?

"Sam. I have no other – "

"O.k. Cas, see you soon!"

The line went 'dead'. I stared at the device in my hand, a frown still upon my face.

" – Clothes." I finished, sighing and rolling out of my bed.

I looked around, and saw what I had seen for the past four years. A modest, four room apartment. The old couple who owned the complex took me in years ago, after finding me sleeping on a park bench. They offered it to me, telling me to take my time in finding my own place.

I still have yet to find one. I actually rather like this place. A small kitchenette, just enough for my few needs. A toilet, shower, and sink with a cabinet above it in the tin bathroom; not enough room to stretch my legs within it. One twin bed, white sheets and blankets in the miniscule bedroom. A bedside table with a lamp and two drawers. In the 'living area' is a straight back chair next to the window overlooking the bustling street. A small stack of books. A dried out spider plant.

Spartan. Everything is white, pristine, in its place.

I like it because it matches my hallow, empty moods.

I shook my head. Such self pity! It would do me well to be with the boys and their never-ending energy again.

I went to the shower and bathed. Tried to comb down my unruly hair. Glanced at myself in the mirror.

Hooded, empty ice blue eyes. A slack, emotionless, mouth. A shadow of stubble over my jaw. Hair falling all over my face. I sighed; not a very – attractive, was the word? – image.

I shuffled back to my bedroom. Pulled on my slacks. Buttoned up my shirt. Laced my shoes on. And shrugged on my coat.

Same thing. Every day.

Feeling adventurous, I pulled on my tie, and made it tight, clean. Not the usual rumpled, loose mess.

I sighed again – I do that quite a bit these days – glancing once more around my apartment.

With the sound of flapping – silken wings, I was gone.

The boys looked startled when I landed in their room.

"Even after all these years…" I said, shaking my head.

Sam laughed shakily, and Dean muttered "Would it kill ya to use a frikin' door? Every frikin' time, every single frikin' time I jump…"

I stood, unsure what to do.

Sam looked down to the watch at his wrist.

"Hmmm… Yeah, we should probably get going. We wanna start this as soon as possible!" He beamed at me, and looked toward me expectantly.

I shifted, uncomfortable with his look; what did he want of me?

Dean sighed heavily, and heaved himself out of his chair.

"Alright Cas, where to?"

I stared blankly at the brothers, mouth opening slightly, brow furrowing.

_Yes, where to? What a wondrous question. One I wish I knew the answer to. _

"I – I don't know. Where does one look for 'The One'?"

The boys looked at each other, uncertainty on their faces. Sam turned to me and said, "Well, Cas, we thought you'd have – I don't know – a feeling?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah, Angle Tuition. Ya know, a tingly feeling here, a 'zzz' there. Anything? A state? Country? Planet? Vague direction?"

I continued to stare at them . I slowly shook my head, and said carefully, "I've never had a 'tingly' feeling or a 'zzz'. I just – don't know."

I sighed, feeling utterly useless yet again.

Sam looked unsure, surely wary of the daunting task in front of him, then cheered.

"It's alright Cas! We'll just drive and see if that jogs something in you!"

I nodded once. Perhaps it moving would help.

Dean scowled at me. "And while I'm driving, we are going to teach you how to act and speak in front of a woman. Jesus, you act like talking will kill you!"

Sam beamed, nodding enthusiastically. "Yeah Cas! It's gonna be fun!"

I gulped. Lessons? From Sam? And… _Dean_? On women?

_Oh. Dear._

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well? Whadya think? It's my first FanFic, so I'm still workin' with the site, and writing in a pre-determined character's view. So much fun! Just hope I'm doing this right!  
Review if you like. It would make me un-believably happy if ya'll left me a 'lil something; constructive criticism, thanks, pictures, recs, whatever you like! Heck, even write a flamer! [In later chapters I can almost guarantee a lot of Supernatural fans will not like my sense of humor and irony.] I actually find them rather amusing, and love to hear people so passionate about things.

Well, I wonder what's going to happen next? Who will Castiel meet? Who is the lady haunting his sub-conscious? How have the boys changed over all these years? And when will the Emo-Castiel personality leave him to reveal the true Castiel we all know and love?

**Recommendations: **Every chapter I'm going to give ya'll a song, a book, and a film Rec straight from my heart for all of your enjoyment.  
Song - 'Sway', by Michael Buble  
Book - 'The Forbidden Game', by L. J. Smith  
Film- 'Phantom of the Opera' 2004 Version

Enjoy!


	2. A Direction

**Title:** Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, Grey Eyes, And … A Feeling

**Author: **Lady Dragon Of The Shifters

**Disclaimer:** Still don't own Supernatural. Nor Castiel. *Sighs* Aunnah is still mine. Silly of me to have mentioned her though; you haven't met her yet! Forgive me for that little oopsie. No more mention of her till she appears. Promise.

**Rating:** T  
-Mild Violence  
-Cussing  
-Slight Suggestive Themes

**Recap: **_Castiel has admitted his feelings to Sam and Dean. Awww!_  
_We took a peak into his incredibly, depressing, lonely new lifestyle._  
_Sam decided they are going on a new hunt. Objective? Oh, just Castiel's Soul Mate. Shouldn't be too hard to find the right girl out of approximately 7 billion people._

* * *

ACDC was blaring from the speakers. Dean was bobbing his head, a slight grin on his face, drumming a finger on the wheel. Sam was in the passenger seat, tapping away at his computer – device. I was in the back seat, watching the landscape outside rush past me, sitting stoically.

I watched as we drove down the highway, as the sign 'Now Leaving Boston, MA' flashed by.

I looked around the vehicle, contented with the pleasant sense of Déjà Vu. Dean's bright green eyes met mine in the rear – view mirror. His grin grew wider, and utter happiness flooded his face.  
"Good to be back, huh Cas?"

I smiled gently, and nodded once.

Sam turned and beamed at me too, then turned back to his device. He frowned slightly, tapped away, then slid a glance at me.

I frowned; what was he doing on that device now?

Sam shifted in his seat, turning to face me as much as he could. He looked back down at his device, then directed a pair of narrowed eyes at me.

My brow began to furrow, and I asked cautiously, "Sam. What are you doing?"

He looked back at me, eyes amused. "Oh, nothing." He said lightly. He tapped at the keys a few more times.

I frowned, then shrugged it off, looking back out the window.

"Heeey Cas, I gotta few questions, just - outa, curiosity."

My ice blues wandered slowly back to meet the intense greens again. "What questions, Sam?" I asked warily.

_Questions? For what? Why?_ _What is that Winchester boy doing now?_

He grinned at me, then read off of his device, "Alright Cas, here we go! 'What would you say are your favorite pastimes?'"

I frowned. "Sam. What does this have to do with anything?"

"Ohhhh nothing!" He sang. "Just answer the questions as they come! Or else I'll just have to answer them to the best of my ability and won't _that _be interesting for you later!" His eyes sparkled with mischief; that was never a good look. I figured I should probably answer his questions – which somehow I felt were going to be ridiculous – before that boy did something that would be harder for me to control and fix.

"Well, Sam, I don't really have a pastime. I spent my first years as a human hunting and protecting and trying to stop the Apocalypse. These days, I don't do much. I visit you boys and – that's it."

Sam looked thoughtfully at me, and tapped at his device saying, "Alright Cas! 'Favorite pastimes are hunting, getting together with friends and – reflection'. Very nice Cas, that sounds deep!" He beamed at me; I was very wary now.

"What sort of entertainment do you like?"

Frown. "Watching people go about their life? Studying the human culture?"

"Hm." _Tap, tap tap, tap. _"'Reality shows, and books.'"

"'What sort of relationship are you looking for?'"

Blank stare. "Sam. Must I go over this again?"

"Right right. 'Life-long commitment.' Wow Cas, that sounds kinda scary, but good at the same time."

"'On a scale of one – to – ten, how religious are you?'"

Furrowed brow. "Well… Sam, I _am_ an Angel. Somewhat."

"Gotcha. 'Eleven.'"

"'Using the scale again, how important do you think looks are in a partner?'"

"Not important at all. If she's the one, I could care less what she looks like."

"O.k. Cas! Next, 'How often-"

"Oh come _ON _already Cas! Are you kidding me?" Sam jumped as Dean exclaimed loudly, and I frowned more.

"What do you need Dean?"

He met my confused look in the review mirror. "You're kidding right? You want to come off as this deep, brooding, bookish, religious guy? And _you don't care how she looks_? Cas! If you're going to do this, and you wanna find a girl to keep around, it would be very helpful to your health if she wasn't hard on the eyes. And you would _really_ appreciate it later."

I spoke slowly, as if explaining to a young child a topic they should understand, but never seemed to grasp.

"Dean. The girl who I am looking for – I want her to be my everything. The one who was made for _me_. The one who _I_ was made for. I could care less what she her appearance is, only because in my eyes, she will be beautiful, no matter what she seems to others."

Dean looked horror-struck. "Jesus Cas, when did you become a chic?"

Sam glared at him. "Dean! Really? Shut the hell up! We all have our different views on love, and who is right for us. Cas doesn't care about outward appearances. That's all you care about. Different people, different views. It doesn't mean either of you are wrong. Even though I still think you are. I mean really Dean, are you so shallow that – "

"Talk time is over!" Dean said, annoyance clear in his voice. He reached over, and turned the music up to a deafening volume.

Sam glared harder at him, then shook his head. He shot me a nice smile, then leaned in so I could hear him shout, "Thanks Cas! One last question then I'll be finished with you for now!"

I nodded once, giving my acquiescence.

"Alright, 'What's your favorite color?'"

I answered immediately. "Grey."

Sam frowned at me. "Grey, Cas? You couldn't be a little more colorful?"

"I like grey. It's a calming soothing color, an easy color."

Sam threw a worried glance at me. "O.k. Cas, if that's your favorite color…." He tapped a few more times, then flashed me a thumbs up, swiveling back to the front of the car.

I looked back out the window, watching as the city I've been living in for the past four years passed by. Leaving it was easy; I wasn't attached to it. Coming back would be harder; I just prayed I wouldn't return alone.

* * *

We drove up and down a main highway, and the boys kept throwing glances at me. I sighed. I knew what they wanted. A city, a state, anything; even a general direction would be good. They had been going up and down this same highway for two hours, waiting for something to happen.

I laid my head back on the seat, and closed my eyes. Perhaps I would dream something to distract me, then I would get a 'zzz' when I wasn't thinking of it. I let my mind drift, and willed my body to take over. Not five minutes later, sleep took me.

* * *

That dream which I always looked forward to - no matter how much it hurt later - came upon me. The warmth, the love, the shadowed woman holding me.

_I'm turning into a masochist, aren't I?_

The woman help him tighter, her head burrowed in his chest. His arms went around her, wanting to take her right out of his subconscious, bring her to the light of day.

They stayed like that for a few moments, then she began to extract herself from his arms.

He frowned, holding her tighter.

This isn't supposed to happen. She's supposed to, to… Well, maybe she wants something different?

She pushed against my chest, asking me silently to let her go. Reluctantly, I released my strangling hold on her. A sigh escaped before I could stop it; I really just wanted to hold her while I could. Now here she was, getting away from me.

I could feel her smile, then her warm hand rested on my cheek. I sighed heavily, leaning into her, closing my eyes, a smile growing on my face.

Suddenly her hand was gone, long before I was ready for it to be. My eyes flashed open, a strangled noise coming out of my throat.

I froze; _what had happened to my dream?_

Instead of the usual shadows and dark in my dream world, I was standing on a grassy knoll. But surrounding me wasn't an emerald forest, or rolling hills. All around me was… Highways. Road, cars whizzing by, horns honking, brakes squealing, big green highways signs…

I looked around, whirling, trying to take in everything.

_Why am I here? Where did my shadow woman go?_

I heard a small giggle, and turned quickly. I knew that sound. Where was she?

_It's day here… There's… Light. Perhaps… Perhaps I will be able to see her._

Vicious hope shot through me, and I beamed, eyes flickering everywhere searching for her.

I saw a figure standing below one of the huge green highway signs. The figure was shrouded in a flowing black cloak. I couldn't see a single part of the figure. But I knew it was _her_. The pull I felt towards her. Then the figure giggled; yes, that was her.

I ran towards her, anxious to get to her before she disappeared; before I could find out who she was.

When I got close, not more than five feet from her, my heart was pounding with happiness, anxiety, and worry. Then suddenly, my feet stopped moving. My body continued to move forward, yet my feet seemed suddenly cemented to the grass. I jerked forward, barely stopping myself from falling on my face.

She laughed, and – even though it was at my expense and I knew she was doing this – I smiled. Her laugh; it was such a gorgeous sound. I could listen to her laugh all day and never tire of the sound.

I could feel her looking at me, smiling in her gentle way. I stared at her, trying to discern any features from under the cloak. The cloak seemed to wrap around her tighter, and I saw the hood shake back and forth.  
I waited, desperately wanting to know what she wanted to tell me. Desperate to have her near me again.

A black, gloved arm snaked out from under the cloak. She pointed it to her right, above her. I reluctantly tore my eyes away from her. She pointed to the highway sign. Surprisingly, it was blank. No direction, no name, no state; nothing. I frowned, and quirked an eyebrow at her.

She pointed to it again, insistent. I looked back to it, and gasped.

On the sign, an invisible hand was scrawling in white ink:

_South_

I whipped back to her, about to bombard her with questions, and saw she was gone.

The hollowness crept back into my chest at her absence.

I felt a light tap on my shoulder. Turning, I was embraced by _her_ familiar warmth. I held her close, breathing a sigh of relief. She nuzzled into me, and tipped her head up. Perhaps I would get there this time before I woke.

She smiled, holding my face between black velveted hands.

Her breath quickened, mine hitched.

Close, so close; just – a – little – mo -

I gasped, eyes flying open.

I was back in the Impala. With Sam and Dean bickering in the front seats. No shadow woman. No warm embrace.

I slammed my head back against the seat. The awful feelings returned. I didn't want them. I wanted the love, the warmth, the worry, the caring for that woman in my dreams.

"Oh Cas, your awake! Finally, you've been snoring for the past half hour, tossing and mumbling."

I ignored Dean; I didn't snore.

"South."

Both boys turned to look at me.

"'South'? Cas, what are you talking about? South what?" Sam asked me, confusion evident in his voice.

Dean raised his brow, then shook his head.

"Delusional Angel-Man and his dreams…"

"No Dean, not 'delusional'. We have to drive South. You both asked me to find out a direction, a little 'zzz'. We must drive South." I sounded sure, and quite honestly, very anxious. I didn't want to wait. I wanted to see her. Today. Now.

Sam tipped his head thoughtfully, and nodded. "Alright Cas, we'll go South. Thanks." He smiled sincerely at me, and patted my knee.

Dean looked back at me incredulously. "Cas, that's all you got from your Angel flight to La – La Land? _'South'_? Cas, we're coming from Boston Massachusetts. _South_ is practically all there is!"

Sam glowered at Dean, and smacked him across the back of the head.

"Sam! What the hell?"

"Dean! Why are you such a douche?"

I sighed, and resumed my post at the window, and promptly ignored the boys' bickering. Again.

Truly not much has changed.

* * *

"Caaassss! Snap outa your staring contest with yourself!"

I glanced towards Dean.

"Yes Dean? May I help you with something?"

He nodded, then tapped the wheel a few times. "See Cas, I was thinking. You said we have to go South. How you figured that out, don't know, don't really care. But I was thinking, 'What places can you meet your Soul Mate South of Boston?" He looked back at me.

Puzzlement settled on my face. "I don't know Dean." I thought back to the few human films I had seen involving romance. "A park? Diner?"

Dean snorted. "No Cas. Absolutely not. That only happens in cheesy romance movies Cas. Real men," he looked back at me, "Real men and Angel-men meet their women in only one place." He grinned wildly at me.  
I was suddenly very afraid.

Sam looked nervous too.

"W-where were you thinking, Dean?" Sam managed to ask.

I simply sat, stiffly awaiting him answer.

His grin grew wider. "Aw c'mon guys! Don't look so nervous! I've met lotsa women there!"

"Dear God…" Sam muttered.

Dean ignored him, and turned to me.

"Cas, I'm going to take you to a night club in NYC, and introduce you to women, and show you how to make a chic fall for you!" He grinned so wide I thought his face would split.

Sam's eyes widened. My jaw fell.

_A night club?_

And here I thought Dean was going to come up with something bad.

* * *

**Author's Note:** There ya go! Another chapter for you all! The chapters will vary in length, so I can't guarantee how often or how quickly I'll be able to update.  
Thanks for all of you how are reading, and especially to those who are reviewing! It's my first FanFic, so the help is greatly appreciated. :)  
Hope you all are enjoying my little story. Can't wait for you all to have the whole thing!  
Also, looking for someone to Beta for me. I apologize for all spelling mistakes, grammar mistakes, etc. I'm really not very good at that sorta thing. If someone could please help me - It would be very helpful if you've seen Supernatural - please send me a message; I could really use someone!

Well, we learned a bit more about everyone and the situation now, didn't we? What was Sam asking all those trivia questions for? And Castiel has _smiled_! Granted, he was sleeping, but still! And, Dean's brilliant idea A _night club_? In _NYC_? With Castiel, Sam, and _Dean_? Oh boy...

**Recommendations: **  
Song - 'Crash', by Gwen Stefani  
Book - 'Swoon', by Nina Malkin  
Film- 'Pride and Prejudice' 2005 Version


	3. Crypt O' Nite Club

**Title:** Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, Grey Eyes, And … A Feeling

**Author: **Lady Dragon Of The Shifters

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything Supernatural. Though I do wish I owned Castiel... Mmmm... what a lovely thought... ;)

**Rating:** T  
-Mild Violence  
-Cussing  
-Slight Suggestive Themes

**Recap: **_They started the journey! Sam has been quizzing Castiel on his life. Castiel had a wondrous dream! And Dean made a great suggestion; clubbing in NYC! _

* * *

Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, Grey Eyes, And … A Feeling

Chp. 3 : Crypt O' Nite Club

I felt horror washing through me. I started shaking my head, repeating "No Dean. Absolutely not. No."

Dean just raised his brow.

"Well then, I guess your not serious about wanting to find your precious girl." He narrowed his eyes, smirking.

I frowned. That wasn't fair to say.

"Dean. Of course I'm serious. I just doubt my – Soul Mate? – will be in a club in New York City. And what would I do in a club? Those buildings are cesspools of sex, violence, drugs, and corruption. The music is too loud, the women too – underdressed. And it reeks of sweat, cheap perfume, overdone cologne, and bad alcohol."

Dean beamed. "Yeah! Sounds perfect!"

I put my face in my hands.

Dean took that as a surrender; honestly, how could I argue with him? And I had little hope in myself; that optimistic speck on my soul said maybe, just maybe, she would be there.

"Alright Dean. We can try. Don't as me to do anything ridiculous though." I could see the plotting wheels turning in his mind already?

He grinned evilly. "Oh don't worry Cas!" His voice was contrastingly innocent.

I was _very _worried.

I turned to Sam, hoping for help.

He was staring at me, eyes narrowed, lips pursed. I automatically looked at my shirt; did I spill something on it? That's the only reason Sam ever looked at me like that.

"Cas." His voice was worried.

"Something wrong Sam?"

"Castiel. Please. If you value my sanity, you will change for tonight."

"Of course Sam." I automatically replied. He sounded so pained, and thought this was so important; how could I deny him he used that voice? Plus, fashion seemed to matter much more to him since after the Apocalypse. Why not indulge him? I was already going to a club, pining after a shadowed woman, going out of my mind; why not add one more torment?

His face shone. "Oh Cas! Yay! You _won't _regret it! You're lucky I packed clothes for you! I even packed specifically for clubbing!"

Seeing the tightening of my eyes, he hastily added, "More clothes too, lots more. Just, everything, just in case."

Dean shook his head, rolling his eyes; he didn't approve of Sam's new fascination with clothes.

"Sissy shit…." He grumbled.

Sam shot him a glare.

"Shut up Dean. Some of us actually obtained hobbies outside of drinking."

He rolled his eyes again. "Whatever Sam. At least it's not girly."

I sighed and tuned them out sensing another Winchester bickering match.

* * *

"Sam. You… can't be… serious."

"Aww c'mon Cas! The girls will go crazy! They'll just wanna eat you up!"

Dean smirked, winking at me. "Lookin' sexy Cas!"

I stared at my reflection in the rest stop bathroom mirror.

I could not believe I let Sam loose like this…

A stranger was staring back at me with horror-struck eyes, shifting uncomfortably.

His dark hair was spiked sharply. A black button up, the sleeves rolled to his elbows, the top half of the buttons undone; his chest was too exposed. Every time he lifted a hand to button the shirt together, Sam slapped his hands away. Dark washed jeans clung to his hard leg muscles. Black work boots peeked out from under the jeans. The most terrifying part? Dark shadows were artfully powdered on under and around his eyes. 'Man gloss' on his lips so he looked "Yummy and kissable" – Sam's exact words, no product of mine.

It was a dark, dark nightmare.

"Sam. How is this… Attractive, to women? It is so… Dark."

Dean shook with silent laughter. Sam huffed.

"Cas! Women _love _dark, mysterious, brooding men! You have everything but the dark, I just had to add some!" He grinned mischievously.

"But… Sam, why must I have the…" I trailed off, gesturing toward the gloss and shadows on my face.

"Oh that? Aw c'mon Cas! I know it's abit odd for you, but you look so much more… Dark. Brooding. Dangerous. Women's fave!"

I sighed. "Sam. I will wear the… Clothes. But I refuse to wear this –"

Dean cut in, "Sam, take the shit off his face. He's a man for fuck's sake, not a chic."

Sam glared murderously at Dean.

"I'm doing this for Cas' comfort, not your nasty mouth."

He stomped over to me, and viciously scrubbed the sticky stuff off my face.

I nodded in thanks; he scowled at me.

I looked myself over. Still scary. Still foreign.

Sam wouldn't let me change a thing.

_Here goes nothing…_

* * *

I sat at the bar, twirling a glass of Captain, sighing.

This was so hard. Getting my hopes up. Getting… Excited; the boys were infectious with their combined happiness. And now… After looking into the faces of dozens of girls, I was starting to lose hope.

Dean had said I needed to talk to them, dance with them, touch them; then make a decision.

But I knew, just knew; I would look at _her_, and the world would melt away. Only she and I would remain. I would _know _it was _her_, before I even knew her name.

I frowned. I didn't want to be here any more. I knew the boys were fine. Ohhh yes. The boys were _juuust fine. _

* * *

Dean had been giving me pointers throughout the car ride, Sam interjecting every now and then.

"Don't stay silent; gotta talk."

_Nod._

"Don't fidget; keep cool."

_Nod. _

"Make sure you get on the dance floor."

_Hesitate. Nod._

"Go to the bar; women are always waiting for men there."

_Nod. _

"And don't you DARE button that shirt!" Sam exclaimed.

No answer.

"Castiel! I _swear _to all that is Holy, I will RIP those buttons right off if you – "

"I understand Sam, don't worry."

I was worried enough for the both of us.

We got to the club. The outside was dark, covered in neon. Lights were flashing from the inside, the flimsy windows rattling from the pounding music.

Dean grinned. Sam smiled. I frowned.

I suddenly felt more self conscious than ever. My hands fluttered to the buttons, when Sam stared at me with flinty eyes. Incredible how someone so innocent looking could be so intimidating; he was wearing a bright purple polo with white jeans, and a giddy smile on his face. Dean smirked at our exchange, looking very dangerous; fitted black tee, black jeans, and boots.

"Here we go Cas!" Dean exclaimed.

We walked up to the door. A big man – he reminded me quite a bit of Uriel with his looks and expression – stopped us at the door, shaking his head.

"Ticket night only boys. And don't tell me you bought one and lost it; I know every single guy and gal who bought one." He rumbled in a deep, lyrical, Caribbean accent. He folded his thick arms across his barrel chest, blocking our way.

Fine by me.

Obviously, not fine for Dean.

Dean looked incredulous. "Ange! C'mon man! Don't you remember me?"

The big man squinted at Dean. Recognition spread over his features.

"Dean? Dean Winchester?" he rumbled, surprised.

Dean spread his arms wide. "The one and only!" He flashed his signature 'Dean-grin'.

The man, Ange, nodded, and stepped aside.

"Go on in."

Dean beamed and walked toward the door.

Right before he got through, Ange's arm shot out, grabbed Dean's lapel, and punched him in the face.

"That's for my little cousin, bastard." His rumbling was immensely satisfied, and he was grinning.

Sam was snorting back laughter; I smiled faintly.

_Oh Dean… The trouble you make for yourself… coming back to you after to all these years._

Dean was rubbing his jaw, laughing breathlessly.

"I probably deserved that Ange." He gave a little wave, grabbed my arm, and pulled us in.

* * *

We had been walking around. The pounding music, pulsating lights were giving me a headache.

We had been wandering; Sam and Dean dancing with various strangers every now and then.

They introduced me to women; women came up to me as I sat and watched Sam and Dean.

I made small talk with the women, but always made some excuse to have them leave. None of them were _her_. They didn't interest me in the least.

Sam, Dean, and I were sipping at drinks at one of the small tables along the edge of the room. We had been chatting, they were admonishing me for not dancing. But they had seen me talking to women at least; that pleased them enough.

For now.

Just as Sam was going to use the restroom, a woman sauntered up to our table.

A thick, waving chestnut mane fell to her mid-back. She was dressed as darkness: black fitted leather jacket, scooped black tee, skin tight black jeans, and black leather boots. Even her eyes looked smoky colored. Her eyes were glinting with mischief, and she smirked at us with ruby-red lips.

All of our jaws dropped.

_Oh not her __**again**__…. How? After all these years? Now?_

Dean and Sam were exchanging panicky looks.

In a husky voice she drawled, "Well handsome, seems like you recognize me. Name's Phoenix. Let's see if we can't get better acquainted, hm?"

She grabbed Sam by the lapels, and dragged him to the women's room right behind us.

Dean and I looked to each other.

"Not her thank God. Didn't mention anything, didn't go all 'psycho-bitch' on us. She would have pulled something."

I nodded. It couldn't have been her. How ridiculous of me. I would have been able to tell. This club was making my thought processes and 'Angel Tricks' dull.

Dean chuckled. "Look at that Cas. Here we are, looking for a chic for you, and Sam gets lucky. Granted, one with a scary Déjà Vou appearance, but still…"

I frowned. "Dean. I doubt… _She_, will be here. In a club."

Dean's face scrunched in confusion. "Cas, what woman doesn't make her way to a club in New York? Just leave it to Fate man! We'll find her, don't worry." He grinned at me. "You know what you need? To dance. C'mon."

I protested, but he pulled me to the dance floor. I tried to avert my eyes from the writhing bodies, but he pulled me to the thick of it. He started dancing with girls; I stood stock-still.

Dean noticed.

"Move to the music man!" He yelled. "Just stop thinkin' about it!"

Just then, a woman wrapped herself around Dean. She latched onto him with white limbs, burying her face in his chest.

Dean looked down, his excited expression turning to horror.

I could see why.

Angelic blond hair softly framed a pale face, falling to her upper back. Her upturned face held child-like eyes. But her mouth… A bright red, feline-like smile. Frightening, doubly so on that gentle, angelic, child face. And she was wearing a small pink dress.

"My name's Lindsay. What's yours?" Her voice was high, tinkling; a young girl's voice, not a grown woman's.

Dean tried to pull her off.

She clung on harder.

"I like you."

Dean's eyes widened. I chuckled, amused. No, it wasn't _her_. He was safe.

I gave a small wave, walking off the dance floor. She was snuggling into him again, Dean trying to pry her off.

* * *

That's how I found myself at the bar.

Alone. Again.

Then, a woman with light blond hair cut into a short bob, pale skin, painted blood red lips walked my way. She wore a bright red dress seemed painted on her, covering _just_ enough.

I looked away; she looked so indecent.

"Hey cutie. You look.. Lonely." Her voice slithered over me, making me shiver. And not in a pleasant way.

I shifted in my seat, ignoring her.

She giggled softly, leaned into me, and put a cold hand on my exposed chest.

I jumped, going wide-eyed.

How many Deja Vou moments can one have in the course of one hour before you should be worried?

Her dark eyes latched onto me.

"Little bit jumpy, aren't we?"

She leaned into me. I leaned back.

She made a frustrated noise in her throat.

She took fistfuls of my shirt, and leaned into me, her nose skimming my jaw.

"Mmm, you smell – mouthwatering."

I jumped right out of my seat that time, falling onto the floor.

She laughed, a shudder-worthy sound.

"C'mon now handsome, I'm not that scary! Just give me a minute to get you to relax."

She advanced on me, a predatory gleam in her eyes.

I scrambled upright; this girl was bringing back too many unpleasant memories. I needed to get out. Now.

I ran to the opposite end of the bar. The bartender gave me an odd look, and followed to where I was staring terror-struck.

He rolled his eyes, grumbling. The girl advanced again. I looked around wildly for any form of escape.

The bartender said ina bored voice, as though he said this quite a lot, "Gem! Boy doesn't want you. Take your whoring elsewhere; I'm losing my customers.

The girl grinned maliciously. "I. Want. Him. I'll have him too. Just gotta catch him. He'll enjoy himself; just have to convince him to."

She lunged at me. I stumbled, falling into a wall.

One moment of defenselessness. And she was on me.

Too warm, her cheap perfume was choking me. Her weight shifted, straddling me. Her mouth covered mine, and now I had saliva all over my face.

Revolted, I shoved her off, gagging.

I heard a crash. Not turning to see the damage, I ran to a darkened corner of the club. Then I flitted outside.

"Sam? Find Dean. We need to leave. Now. I'm in the car. Unlock it _only_ when you are here. Hurry."

_Click._

* * *

**Author's Note: **Alrighty! Sorry 'bout the wait guys! took me a while to write this out. It was fifteen pages hand-written_; _yet, it's not long at all here. I must say, I'm very disappointed. I apologize to you all. _  
_Thank you all for reading! Every time I see the number of people viewing my story increase, it makes me so happy! And whenever one of you reviews, it just makes my day! Please review everyone! I would really appreciate it. Questions, comments, suggestions; anything! I'm super new to this, so anything is greatly appreciated, and I LOVE talking with you all! Also, the reviews don't have to be glowing, praises; I like constructive criticism too!  
Hope you all liked this chapter; now I am starting a bit of the humor. Hopefully it all goes over well. :)  
Still interested in a Beta, if anyone would care to help.

Well. Well. Well. That's the nightclub fiasco! Gosh, I wish I had seen Castiel dressed like that; mmm... Who's with me?  
Also, there was a few things I want you all to tell me in a review or message; I wanna see you guys using your brains! Prove to me you know your stuff!  
Where does the name of the club come from? I assure you, I didn't simply invent it.  
What's so special about Ange's name?  
And who were are three - erm, 'lovely'? - ladies based after? And if you guys can't catch who they are, so help me, I WILL make you sit down and watch all six seasons. In one sitting. Then I assure you, you will not ever forget anything about them.  
Now what will happen? Poor Castiel didn't find the one there. Didn't the lady say to go South? She's such a tease! Maybe Sam will have a better idea next chapter...?

**Recommendations: **  
Song: 'Disco Pogo', by Frauenarzt and Manny Marc  
Book: 'Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters', by Ben H. Winters and Jane Austen  
Film: 'Romeo and Juliet', 1968 Version by Franco Zeffirelli


	4. Oopsies And a Map?

**Title:** Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, Grey Eyes And… A Feeling

**Disclaimer: **All things Supernatural, unfortunately, do not belong to me. Nor does Castiel.*Sad face*  
The story and ideas behind it, however, are all mine own.

**Rating: **T  
-Mild Violence  
-Cussing  
-Slight Suggestive Themes

* * *

**Recap**_**: **__Last chapter the boys and Castiel visited a… club. In New York city. Aaand Castiel dressed up all sexy, looking for his girl. Yay! But… They all had scary déjà vous meetings. And Castiel… Ahh, poor Castiel got mauled by a woman. No Soul Mate in New York Dean. Surprise, surprise..._

* * *

Sam and Dean came rushing to the Impala. They banged on the window, faces worried.

"Cas? Open up! What's wrong?"

I unlocked the doors, pressing into a corner of the car.

"Get in, quick! Close the doors!" I pulled the boys in, re-locking the doors.

Sam looked around wildly, Dean scrambling for the emergency kit-Winchester Style-in the glove box.

"What was it Cas? Witch? Hex bag? Ghoul? Ghost? What do I need?" He turned to me. "Cas! Talk! What was it?"

Now that the boys were here, I realized my actions were a bit… Over the top. No need to have panicked so. I gulped, feeling rushing heat in my face. The boys were going to be mad.

"Um, well… It's not-that-kind of emergency Dean…"

He stopped scrambling, and Sam relaxed slowly.

Sam asked gently, "What kind of emergency Cas? What happened?"

I flushed again, and the words rushed out of my mouth; "_'____'mhidingfromher_ ."

The boys looked at each other. They mouthed words, trying to figure out my convoluted sentence.

At the same moment, they looked to each other, eyes widening. Their mouths floundered open, and they began to laugh hysterically. I felt my mouth setting in a hard line.

"This. Is. Not. Amusing."

Both stopped abruptly, hearing the barely restrained worry and violence in my voice.

Dean rolled his eyes. "Oh c'mon Cas. You gotta admit, it's kinda funny." He grinned. "Cas plus whore plus déjà vous equals a good laugh. Right Cas?"

I glared at them, my voice and face hard as I replied, "Drive, Dean."

Both the boys chuckled, and climbed into their respective seats. I crawled to the back seat; looking out the rear window, I saw something moving around the car. It was shadowed, and moving swiftly to my door.  
My eyes widened, and I felt my scalp tingling. There was something _not good _out there.

"Dean!" I exclaimed. "Hit the gas!"

Dean jumped at my shout, and the car shot backward.

Sam yelled at Dean to stop; I yelled at him to go forward; Dean just yelled.

Then we heard it.

_**BUMP**_

CRACK

The curl lurched to a stop. It was immediately silent within. We all looked to one another, eyes wide, mouths hanging open.

Sam whispered, "Oh. My. God." At the same time Dean hoarsely said, "_My car." _The boys looked to one another, blanching.

I said in a shaky voice, "I'll see who it was. Help them, if I am able."

The boys barely nodded, too shocked to do anything else.

I slid out of the car, going cautiously to the rear of the Impala. I peeked around the trunk, looking to see who we hit and what condition they are in.

My eyes nearly popped out of my head.

_Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no-_

Bobbed blond hair, tangled and falling over.

Mud streaked skin tight, red dress.

And twitching too white limbs.

A strangled noise escaped my mouth.

I whirled, getting into the Impala in record time. The boys jumped as I slammed the door.

"Who was it? Are they o.k.?" Sam exclaimed as Dean trembled out, "_My car_. I. My. Car. Alright?"

I shook my head quickly, stammering out, "D-drive! J-just drive!"

* * *

The car was silent for once.

But every now and then a giggle or chuckle would escape from the front seats. I would glare into the rear view mirror, and it would stop abruptly.

I sighed, pulling my trench coat closer. I had changed as soon as the car started moving; I would not be subjected to that any longer. Sam had made a 'puppy face', begging me to keep it on.

No longer.

Now Sam was tapping away at his computer device, pointedly ignoring me. Then Dean kept making comments about Gem; which, of course, brought up the subject of… Meg. I shudder to even think either of their names. One look from me, and Dean couldn't speak. I must admit, I was a bit smug about it; quiet Castiel, silencing Dean Winchester. I smiled, a slight up-turn of the lips; Dean glared and mouthed profanities. But, he could still laugh. And did so often.

And that was how the Winchester Impala was silent, save for a few errant laughs.

I decided to try and sleep: the club had taken my night, and the past few hours of driving I have been ridiculed, interrogated, and fearful of sleep.

I'm afraid to sleep. I know of nightmares; I fear I will have one if I close my eyes.

I shuddered. Seeing Gem once was enough; I didn't wish to see her ever again.

But I couldn't hold of slumber any longer.

I felt my eyelids flutter close, and my conscious drifted away.

* * *

I choked on the smell.

What was it? I could hardly breathe.

Strong arms wrapped around me from behind. The smell became stronger, suffocating.

I tried to relax; _she _had never smelled before, had any noticeable scent. But she was holding me close, as usual.

But her hold was… too strong. Too insistent. It hurt.

I tried to pull back a little to see her. See if she was hurt or worried; why would she be so different?

She didn't relax her hold, no matter how hard I pulled. I whirled in her hold, turning to face her.

Blond bobbed hair brushed my face. Glinting eyes met mine.

Too-red lips descended on mine.

I sat up, screaming. Gasping, I tried to calm myself.  
_Justadreamjustadream…_

I heard a soft rustling, and whirled toward it.

I held my breath; it was _her. _The _real her. _The shadowed figure. Her cloak was rustling; moving up and down.

She was shaking… With… Laughter?

I frowned. What was amusing to her?

Then I cracked a grin; surely it must have been me and my antics.

I had made her laugh! _Me!_

I hurried over to her, wanting to be as close to her as possible after what has happened.

I sighed as her warmth enveloped me. Wrapping my arms around her, I snuggled as close as I could. She returned the embrace for only a moment before stepping back.

I looked at her, confused and worried; did she not want my touch anymore? Have I offended her? Did my club 'experience' make me unclean?

I reached out to her again, and she gently pried my hands away. She took a step back, and motioned to the landscape around us.

That was when I finally noticed where we were: Rolling fields of golden wheat surrounded us. It was gently swaying with the non-existent breeze. The sky was a pure blue; all I could see was gold and blue, gold and blue…

Then it began to fade. I panicked, fearing my dream was over far too soon again.

_She _chuckled (I always _feel_ her emotions and sounds rather than see or hear them; quite fascinating when I first discovered this happening.) and grabbed my hand.

The scenery seemed to bleed out, leaving only white. White nothingness.

I pulled her closer, worried what might be in this place. It seemed harmless, but after all the years with Sam and Dean? I never took any chances. Even within my dreams.

As I scanned around, looking for _anything_, she tugged on my hand. I turned to her, and she pointed to the ground. I looked down, and knitted my brows in confusion.

We were standing on a black dot. Then the dot began to move. Very slowly, it went to the right, then left. AS it moved, lines bled out of it; red lines, blue lines, orange lines. They continued to grow, and twist, moving all around us. The black dot continued to move slowly along a red line. I watched, dumbfounded.

_What could it possibly mean…?_

I looked to my shadowed woman for answers. She merely shook her head and pointed again.

I looked back to the lines, and jumped.

It was a map; a detailed road map, spanning a huge amount of space. I recognized it from Sam's musings on where we were to go. I recognized the states, the rivers, and some of the roads. There was a star on NYC, NY. I quickly looked away; never again would I ever go there, not even look at it. Too many horrible thoughts.

She 'giggled'; watching as I was taking everything in. She pointed to the black dot again. I watched it move along. Intrigued, I moved closer to it. Kneeling on the map, I leaned in close to the dot.

The red line was a highway; I remembered passing the sign for it. The 'dot' was actually the Impala; a miniature toy car Impala, driving down the road. Leaning closer still, I looked inside the car, and laughed aloud.

A little doll Dean was driving the car, a bored expression on his tiny face. A diminutive Sam was tapping away at his minuscule laptop. In the back seat, a trench-coated figure slept. ACDC was blaring out, a tinny sound.

I looked up to her, laughing and grinning. She 'smiled', and took a deep bow. Walking over to me, she gave me a gentle push.

Confused, I looked back up at her. She shakes her head, points, and pushes me again.

I looked to where she pointed and the direction she pushed me in.

I groaned, looking up at her and asking apprehensively, "South again?"

She 'giggled' and nodded, giving me another gentle shove.

I sighed. Well, at least I knew which way to start driving again.

I stood, wrapping her up again in me. I sighed contently, settling into her familiar, stunning warmth.

I pulled back slightly, and squinted into the hood of her cloak. I wanted to try to see past her shadows, wishing to truly see her.  
She 'smiled'. Shadowed hands reached up to her hood and-

"Cas! Cas! CAS! Wake up!"

I jolted awake to Sam shoving at me. I rumble, and said sharply, "Sam! I. Am. Awake." He paused in his pushing and appraised me.

He smirked and asked playfully, "Oh Cas! Did I wake you up from a 'good' dream?"

I thought of her warmth, her feelings, _her-_

I shook my head, and mumbled, "You have no idea…"

Dean looked at me in the rear view mirror and chuckled. "Alright wonder boy, where to? I've been driving this same highway in New York for hours, waiting for you and your Angel Tricks to give me a direction. See anything in your 'special' dream?" He grinned at me.

_Her _smile was so much prettier…

I pulled at my hair, trying to focus on the boys.

"Right, I apologize Dean. I have another Direction. South." Both the boys looked at me, then each other, brows raised.

Dean shook his head, and turned the car around. "Whatever you say Cas." He began to grin, no doubt thinking of all the shenanigans he could pull again.  
Sam frowned a bit. "South? Hmmm… I think I can make this work." He turned back to tapping away at his computer.

I was instantly suspicious; you have to be when one of them has a plan in mind.

"Sam-" I began, wanting to rid him of any ridiculous notions right away.

"Cas," he interrupted, ignoring me completely. "What would you say is a good trait in a woman?"

I paused, and floundered for an answer.

"I… Well, I… I don't really….know Sam. Why?"

He glanced up at me, smirking at me. "Ohhh, nothing!" he sang. "Sooo who is you role model?"

"…Sam-"

"What is your favorite type of music?"

"Sam, please-"

"What is your idea of a perfect day?"

The questions went on and on. He would ask, I'd stare, he'd hum, he'd tap away, and start all over.

I was beginning to become very nervous.

Again.

* * *

**Author's Note: **FINALLY! I got this chapter to you all! My GOODNESS I apologize guys! Life has been pretty insane lately and I'm the _slowest_ typer EVER, so just getting this little chapter out has take FOREVER! Thanks for sticking around though guys, and not pestering me! I'll start on the next chapter tomorrow, and have it to you ASAP!  
Still looking for a Beta, if anyone is interested. :)  
Oh, and guys, let me know if I do too much talking. Honestly, you can say, 'We don't care; less TALKING, more WRITING!' Not sure how much involvement ya guys want from me. :)  
Oh, and the three women who were referred to in the last chapter, that I thought every one would get but no one did? Phoenix was Ruby ("_RUBY_ red lips?"), Lindsay was Lilith, or Lilly ("_CHILD-like_" stuff?), and Gem was Meg. (O.k., really? Must I point this one out?)  
And you may be wondering about why Gem is the victim in the beginning; my only available revenge on Meg. C'mon guys, you all are reading a Castiel FanFic; not one of you should like her. I SO do NOT approve of her being all over Castiel. Not. One. Bit.

Well well well. A nice 'lil chapter. As we all know from Supernatural, Karma's a bit-jerk. Castiel's dream sequence; a personal favorite of mine! Aaand they are going... SOUTH again! (Yay!) What will happen next? And Sam is playing twenty questions again! Why? WE'll just have to see, won't we?

**Recommendations: **  
Song- 'Cell Block Tango' from 'Chicago  
Book- 'The Divine Comedy' by Dante Alighieri  
Film - Watch a re-run of the Royal Wedding! I _insist!_ ;D


	5. Surprises

**Title:** Trench Coats, Cowboy Boots, Grey Eyes, And … A Feeling

**Author: **Lady Dragon Of The Shifters

**Disclaimer:** Still don't own Supernatural. Nor Castiel. *Sniffles* It's a lonely life without my Angel.

**Rating:** T  
-Mild Violence  
-Cussing  
-Slight Suggestive Themes

**Recap:**_ Dean, Sam, and Cas had an... accident. So, the boys left New York, and Cas fell asleep... only to have another dream! And what a good dream; so cute and neat! So the Impala is headed South again. Let's see what happens next farther South._

* * *

We drove mindlessly in the car for the next few days. I watched the scenery whizzing by, appreciating the beauty of the South. It was so different from the bustling cities we just left. Yes, we've been here many a time before on hunts. And yes, I suppose we were in another sort of 'hunt'. But I've never really stopped and looked around, never really cared to notice the surroundings. I watched the country pass by, lulling into a slight state of peace.

I never forgot what we were doing. I could _never_ forget _her. _But I did calm a bit.

"Cas, this seems like a good place for you."

I was startled out of my reverie by Sam. He was looking at me in the rearview mirror, a slight smile upon his face.

I looked back out the window.

"It certainly is… Peaceful."

"This must be a good omen Cas! We'll find her here probably! Living here would do you good!"

"I hope so Sam."

I glanced at Dean. He had been silent for a while. He was glaring out the window, storms rolling across his face hands clenched around the wheel. He looked deep in thought.

Oh no.

I began slowly. "Dean-"

"We gotta pull over. I'm starving." he said in a flat voice.

Sam looked over at him, surprised. "Wow. So you've finally spoken. Ok, we can pull over."

Sam was humming tunelessly, as Dean pulled off the main road. He drove along, looking for some place to eat. He finally found a little diner, and pulled in.

We all got out, and walked in. The bell above the door tinkled sadly. The lights flickered above us. Sam turned towards me, eyebrows raised.

I shook my head. "Not me. Old lights."

We looked around us, looking at the diner more closely.

It was, let's say, not the best place we have ever stopped.

We sat down at a booth. The vinyl was sticky and peeling off the hard seats. The table top was greasy and dull. The place reeked of burnt food and cigarettes. A static-y radio blaring out some game results was in a corner. The floor was grimy and begging for a washing. Two tired, haggard men sat at the counter. They barely spared us a glance, and continued looking listlessly into the air in front of them, sipping at their coffee. The waitress was an older woman, looking at though she stepped right out of the sixties, as she stood behind the counter, snapping her gum, filing her nails. The cook was leaning against the door to the kitchen, listening to the radio; he was a portly man, grizzled, and mean looking.

Sam looked around him, a pained expression on his face.

"I need disinfectant. Like, twenty gallons of it. And some plastic gloves." He grimaced at the table, keeping as far away from it as possible.

I looked around, taking it in. "There have been worse places."

Dean shrugged. "Whatever. It has food."

Sam and I exchanged glances. Dean sounded, angry.

"Dean-"

"Wha' ken Aye getcha fellers?" We turned, and the waitress was beside our booth, looking expectedly at us, her hip popped, gum snapping, pencil and pad poised. She spoke with a thick Southern accent.

"Water and whatever plate has the most food you got." Dean replied.

Sam grimaced slightly. "I'll just have, ah, coffee." He said painfully.

"Just water please." I said.

The waitress raised a brow at us. She turned on her heel, muttering, "Damn Northerners…"

We all turned back to our table, Sam and I looking expectedly at Dean. He looked over at us, then back down at the table.

"What the hell are you two lookin' at?"

Sam sighed. "Dean. You're obviously upset. What's wrong?" he said carefully.

Dean frowned, and glared out the window. He ran a hand frustrated through his hair. "Look. Cas man, not to sound like a homo, but I love you man. Love you like a brother. But this adventure… My woman called last night. She misses me. The boy misses me. They try not to show it when they call, but, I can tell. They want you to be happy. They care too Cass. But this is real hard on them. And we all don't know how long this will take. Or how it will work. Or when I can go home. They depend on me Cas. I wanna help you but this… I've grown up Cas. Crazy, I know. But I've grown up, and escapades – Hell yeah, I just used a Sam word – like this, I just can't do them." He looked away from us.

Well.

Sam looked shocked. I just looked away from him.

"Dean! We owe Cas so much! We gotta do this for him! It shouldn't take too long! How dare you-"

"No Sam. Stop." Both boys looked at me at the sound of my ever calm voice. "Neither of you ever owe me anything." I looked Dean in the eye. "Dean. If you must go home, go. Tell your family I appreciate their sacrifice. I understand you have a life. You have a family, a woman you love. I'm asking too much, asking you to leave all that."

I turned to Sam.

"Sam, you too. You've got your schooling, and I'm sure there are a hoard of women waiting for you to get back. Both of you should go back home. Return to your lives. I can go this adventure alone. I've gone on hunts alone before. This one shouldn't be any different." I gave them both gentle smiles.

No, I didn't think I could do it alone. But those boys needed to go home. They had lives. They had women that loved them. I could try and go it alone; I couldn't ask all this of the boys any longer. They wanted to leave. And I would let them.

The boys looked toward each other. A silent conversation seemed to be happening between them. I tried watching them, trying to figure out what was being passed between them. But, of course, as usual, I was locked out of the brotherly bond.

Dean sighed as Sam beamed.

"Fuck it. You both win. Cas, you're too damn noble and nice for me to leave you alone. And Sam, you are too damn annoying. You would never let me live it down, and I would always feel bad for not helping Cas. So, I'm sticking with you guys. From now on. Let's just hope it happens quickly."

I smiled nearly fully at Dean. "Thank you Dean." I said quietly.

Sam beamed. "Oh yay! Wonderful! So glad this all worked out. Now, I know where we are going next, and hopefully things will work out quickly from there! I have a good feeling about this one Cas!" He winked at me. He was nearly bouncing in his seat.

First Dean's 'good idea'. Now Sam's 'good idea'.

I sighed.

"Hopefully Sam."

"Sooo, Sam. What is it?" Dean asked.

"It's a surprise!" he sang.

"Can we at least know where it is?" I asked wearily.

"Roanoke Virginia!"

Just then, the waitress appeared again. She plopped down our food, things spilling over. She glared at us.

"Need any'in' else strangas?"

We shook our head meekly, under her potent glare.

She harrumphed, spun her heel, and went back to the counter.

We looked at the food in front of us. My water was in a grimy plastic cup, and had little specks floating through it. I pushed it away.

Sam looked gingerly at his chipped mug of coffee. He took a tiny sip. He spat it out immediately, disgust clear upon his face. He shoved his mug away.

Dean watched our reactions, and shrugged. He dug into his food, smiling happily, chowing down. Sam and I looked on, amazed.

"You truly will eat anything, won't you?" Sam asked, disgust and awe evident in his voice.

"Yep."

* * *

The next day, Dean parked outside a park in the beautiful city of Roanoke, Virginia. He looked over at Sam. "Alright, here's the address you gave me. What are we doing here?"

Sam smiled at Dean, then beamed at me.

"Oh Cas, I'm just _so_ excited! See, I've had this planned for a while, and now everything is set up, and now we are here, and now it's going to happen, and it's all just so exciting!" Sam was bouncing up and down in his seat now. Dean just looked at him, and shook his head.

"Yeah, that's nice. But tell us _what's_ going on. Cas at the very least needs to know."

"I agree with Dean for once."

Sam sighed. "I suppose this can't all be a surprise huh? Huff. Fine. I'll tell you."

"I don't know what's worse. How much suspense you are putting into this or the fact you actually said 'huff' out loud."

Sam shot him a quick glare. He turned to me. "So. Here's what's going down Cas. You remember all those questions I was asking you?"

"Yes…" I answered hesitantly.

Sam smiled. "Well. There's this thing called "eHarmony-"

Dean groaned. "Sam you've got to be fucking kidding me! I was _joking _when I suggested that!"

Sam shot him a glare. "Well I thought it was a good idea!" He huffed and turned back to me, smiling.

I looked between the two brothers, very confused and worried. "'eHarmony'?"

Sam nodded. "It's a website on the internet, that people use to find potential partners in life. You answer a bunch of personality questions, so they can find a person whos personality goes well with yours! So, Dean suggested it, and I thought it was actually a good idea!" He coughed, and added in a mutter, "For once…" He shot Dean a smirk, who in turn flipped him off. "Anywho, I filled out your personality profile, and you got a hit! There's a girl waiting for you right in this park! eHarmony said she was a _perfect_ match! I can't wait! C'mon Cas! We gotta go bring you to meet her!"

I looked toward Dean, who was looking toward me. We exchanged loaded looks. He shrugged.

"Whatever. Worth a try Cas."

I sighed.

Sam had lead me through the park, dragging me behind him, practically skipping down the paths. Dean was following behind us, kicking at rocks, and constantly checking his cellular device. Sam sent a look over his shoulder.

"Dean, chill out. Your wife will call you soon."

Dean glowered at him. "Shut up."

Sam giggled – giggled? – and pulled me to a beautiful little spot in the park. There were weeping willows separating a wooden carved bench from the rest of the park, at the end of a gravel path. Flowers were swaying in the gentle breeze, brushing along the luscious grass. There was a sweetness hanging in the warm air, and the soothing noises of nature; birds chirping, leaves fluttering, wind rustling.

I stood, taking it all in. After stopping the Apocalypse, I have found I can truly appreciate bits of life. Granted, only parts. But so much more than before. I see the beauty in nature scenes such as this. They take away even my cold breath.

A shrill _riiing_ broke through my bubble of peace and contentment. I glanced over at Dean, who was beaming and fumbling for his device. He put it to his ear, and immediately started talking. He waved to us, mouthing, 'Good luck', and wandered away.

Sam let go of his iron grip on my arm. He looked me over, and frowned.

I never liked that look.

"Cas…" he began.

"Sam, if it's about my clothing style, I think it's perfectly fine, and I will not allow you to dress me up like some sort of child's doll again."

Sam gave me a little pout. "But Caaas!" he whined. "Just, look at you! It's painful to see! You're in a white button up, black slacks, black shoes, blue tie, and a _trench coat_! SO boring, so so horrible!" Sam looked like her was going to… cry?

"Sam. I appreciate your, concern. But, if I'm trying to find my soul mate, she won't care what I look like. So why change what I normally wear?"

Sam seemed to deliberate this. He sighed dramatically. "Fiiine. I suppose you are right… But when we get home, I am so getting you a whole new wardrobe." He shot me a glare. "Now, sit on that bench and wait for your gal! I gotta go, so, good luck!" He patted shoulder, and spun on his heel.

I frowned.

"Sam, where do you have to go? You want me to be alone with a woman? By myself?"

"Well, yeah Cas!" he said, exasperated. "You're going to have to be alone some time, so why not start now? And besides; I'm meeting someone." He smirked, gave me a little wink, and went back down the gravel path.

I stood, unsure and immobile from nervousness. I hesitantly turned to the beautiful bench, and sat down slowly.

And waited.

And waited.

And, waited.

It's a good thing I'm good at waiting.

Finally, after some time, I heard footsteps crunching up the gravel path. I sat perfectly still, nervous to see what woman came up the path, and if I would feel that '_zzz'_ when I saw her.

I turned toward the path and saw what awaited me.

"_Hello there."_

* * *

Oh… Not what I was expecting.

At all.

Before me stood… Two women.

I sent the pair what must have been an awkward smile.

"Hello. Can I help you with something?" I asked.

The women looked toward one another, and smiled.

"Are you Cas?" they asked at the same time.

I sighed. Why must everyone use that horrid nickname?

Wait a moment… How do these strangers know my name?

"Yes." I answered cautiously. "Can I help you?" I repeated.

One stepped forward. "You posted to eHarmony. We are the ones who responded to you! You told us to meet you at this park right about – " She checked her watch. "Now! Aaand, sooo, here we are!" She spoke with such energy, happiness, and chipper.

"Oh." I looked around uneasily. Where was Sam when I needed him? "Did you say 'the ones' who responded? I-I wasn't aware _two_ of you would be coming." What did Sam do for me? Did he expect me to have two women? What was wrong with him? How could he put me into this horribly uncomfortable situation?

The woman who had spoken gave a little giggle. "Oh gosh, aren't you just the cutest 'lil thing? Lemme explain!" She skipped over to me, dragging along her silent companion.

The two were… Quite the pair. The talkative one looked… Peppy. That's the only word that I can think of to describe her.

She was pixie like in stature. Her hair was pin-straight and fell to her mid-back, and was a lovely pure gold color. She wore a white lace sun dress. She wore shimmery, sparkling eye makeup, and her lips shined with a pink lip gloss. She had limited jewelry; simple silver drops at her ear, simple bangles jangling on her wrists. And around her neck was a large silver cross.

Her companion was, the complete opposite.

She was tall and willowy, and had a good four inches on her companion. Her hair was black as pitch and cut very short, spiked about her head. She wore all black; black heavy knee high boots, black netting on her legs, black leather mini skirt, black lace deep-'v' tank top, and a black leather jacket. Her makeup was… Intense. Very black, thickly rimmed eyes, and "smoky" shadows about her lids. Her lips were painted blood red. Her jewelry was, interesting; a spiked collar on her neck, lots of little colorful bands up and down her arms, and a necklace. Of an upside down cross.

Oh my...

The two of them noticed me looking them over, taking in their startling appearances. The blond gave me a little wink, while the slightly scary one smiled a slow smile, oozing with sin.

"Weeell Cas, now that you're done your perusal…" The blond giggled and re-began her talking. "See, Cas, we are twins!"

…Twins? The only things that were similar amongst them were their pale skin and brown eyes.

"Aaand, as twins, we do _everything _together. Shopping, eating, exercising, traveling, aaand dating! We always, _always_ share our dates!"

I felt my eyes widen. "'Share' your dates'? As in… You both date the same man at the same time?"

The blond beamed. "Yes! Isn't it great? I mean, we've had some trouble with guys, but, clearly they weren't right for us!"

I gulped. "Um, right…"

The scary one sighed. "Excuse my overly happy, preppy sister. She hasn't introduced us. I'm Jessica, and the annoying one is Ruby." Her voice was like dark, smooth velvet, low and seductive.

My heart stopped for a moment. _Jessica and Ruby_?

Ruby gasped. "Ohmygosh! I'm sooo sorry! I just get, so, so excited! Anywho, it's so nice to meet you for real!" She was practically bouncing up and down.

Jessica gave my person a slow and thorough inspection. She smirked. "Yes. It is _very_ nice to meet you Castiel." The way she said my name… I shuddered unpleasantly.

I am not going to survive this…

"Ah, yes, nice to meet you ladies." I said nervously. "But, ah, I wasn't expecting two women to meet me here-"

Ruby giggled. "Oh silly, we wanted it to be a surprise! Usually, when we tell guys, they run away, sooo we decided to surprise you!"

"Oh, I'm surprised…" I gave a nervous laugh.

Ruby bounded forward and sat beside me on the bench. I shifted over a few inches, sending her a tight smile. She shifted closer again, beaming at me, and threw her arms around my neck. Jessica slinked over to the bench, and slid onto the bench on my other side. She sent me a dark smile, and laid a possessive hand on my thigh.

I froze.

_Dear Brother Michael please help me…_

I tried to give a quiet chuckle, to appear nonchalant. But, it ended up coming out like a squeak. I tried to jump up from the bench, and make my escape. Four arms clamped down on me, around my neck and around my waist, holding me where I was.

Ruby sent me a hurt pout. "Where are you going? We haven't even talked yet!" she whined.

Jessica ran her hands all over my chest. "Yeah, we haven't even, _gotten to know one another._"

I gulped.

"Look. I, ah, appreciate the interest ladies. I'm afraid, I, ah, have to go though."

Ruby looked at me, eyes narrowed. "'Go'? Where do you possibly have to 'go'? Can't it wait? Aren't we important? Don't you want to get to know us?"

Jessica's hand became more insistent. "Castiel, we like you, _very much_. You're _perfect._" she purred in my ear.

"Ah, yes, well, thank you ladies. I really do apologize. I have a, ah, an appointment." Good Castiel! "Yes, a very important appointment. I'm afraid I have to go. It was, uh, a pleasure, to meet, you, both…" I cleared my throat, sent the two women a tight smile, and once again attempted to get up.

Again, arms held me down.

Ruby grabbed my chin, and roughly pulled my face toward her. My eyes widened as I took in her face; she looked furious, her brown eyes sparking.

"Don't you _dare_ try to leave us again. Every other man we have tried has run away from us, and you are the _perfect _man; I can just feel it. Here you are, and there is no way in all of hell I am letting you go now."

Jessica smirked and leaned her body into mine more. "You are staying right here, Mr. Perfect."

They both leaned in at the same time, one at each ear. "With us. Forever." they whispered at the same time.

I took in a shaky breath.

* * *

Two and a half hours later, I was still trapped. Ruby had somehow managed to crawl her way onto my lap, while Jessica was draping herself around me.

They told me all about themselves in those two and half hours.

And if I thought I was scared before… I'm beyond terrified now.

These women were certifiably insane.

Now Castiel, you say, don't be so mean. Sure, they are a little creepy, but they aren't insane. Give them a chance Castiel you say.

I ask you this then; would you give two people, who want to be your mate at the same time, a chance, when they say this? Quote on quote from Ruby, "Castiel, I heard from Them that you were coming! That you and you alone were the one for us!" Courteously, I asked, "Who are 'Them'?" Ruby giggled. "Oh silly! The voices in my head!"

"Oh…"

And no, it's not Angels; they aren't allowed to do that anymore. So that means…

Then there's Jessica. "Castiel… I too saw you coming. I saw you in my dreams _every single night_. I also asked my Master if you, the one, were finally coming for us. And he said yes." I tentatively, fearing the answer, asked, "And, ah, who, is your, master?" Jessica smirked and – purred? – at me. "The Devil." She whispered.

So, I ask you again. Would you give two people wanting to be with you at the same time – siblings, remember – when one is truly insane, and the other worships the Devil? The very same Devil I fought against for millennium?

I think not.

Plus, neither one even gave me the tiniest of '_zzz_'. If one or both had given me that '_zzz_', then I would ignore the unsettling facts about them, really get to know them better, and I would love them no matter what. I wouldn't care that others thought they were strange, or what 'conventional' women-slash-girlfriends were 'supposed' to be. I needed to find the one who did that for me.

I just wanted to leave.

_Sam, Dean, where are you? Save me!_

I looked around me, hoping, praying, someone would come to my rescue, anyone! But, of course, Sam choose the most private, secluded, empty spot of the park for our 'date'.

Getting desperate, I considered ignoring the rules, and just 'poofing' out of here, not caring what these women saw.

Then, I saw my opportunity! Ruby yawned theatrically, stretching her arms wide, leaning back so that she was practically on the bench again, instead of my lap. Jessica too yawned, leaning away from me to hide it behind her hand.

As soon as the two lost contact with me, I jumped up.

"I really must go. It was, ah, nice to meet you. Have a good evening." I said quickly, backing away from the bench.

Ruby sat up, her Angelic looking face turning demonic.

"_Don't even think of leaving!"_ she screeched.

My eyes widened more, as I backed up a few more paces.

Jessica turned to me, her smirk coming out full force.

"Go ahead, run; we'll just catch you. And I do love a good chase." she purred.

I turned.

And _ran._

I ran as I have never run before. I could hear the girls behind me; Ruby screeching and swearing, Jessica laughing manically.

I ran faster.

They tried to follow me as I ran through the park. But, with much evasion, distraction, and outright running as though my trench coat were on fire, I got far ahead of them. Knowing I couldn't run forever, and that they could probably run longer than me – the power of insanity and determination - I decided I had to hide.

I dived into a bush along the path. I didn't make a sound as my face was scratched, or when my hands were grazed raw from the ground, or when I could hardly move from being cramped. I didn't care about anything in that moment except for being perfectly silent.

I did _not_ want them to find me.

I heard as they approached my brush; I waited, holding my breath. I could see them from between the branches, and prayed they could not see me.

Ruby was panting hard, pouting, with the stormiest, angriest expression I have ever seen on a woman as petite and pure looking as her. She pulled at her hair, and stomped at the ground.

"It isn't fair! I wanted _him_! He was supposed to be ours! And he ran away, just like all the others!"

Jessica was hardly even breathing hard, after all that running. She sighed. Instead of looking confident and oozing with sin, she looked, melancholy. She put a slim arm around her sister's shoulder, and pulled her close.

"I know Rubes, I know. I thought he was the one too… Don't worry; we'll find him later, ok? Let's just go home for today…" And off the Twins went.

'_Don't worry; we'll find him later.'_ I shuddered. I certainly hoped not. I had just barely escaped them; and I never want to be near them again.

Sighing wearily, I pulled myself out of the other side of the bush. I stood up, brushing off my trench coat. I heard a shocked inhale, and looked up quickly.

And in front of me was a scene my entrance had interrupted.

Also hiding in this little alcove of bushes was a couple, tangled up in each other. They obviously had been quite, involved, with each other's mouths when I showed up, breaking the moment. But, that wasn't the most surprising part. What was most surprising, was the couple themselves.

A young man, perhaps in his mid-twenties was one of the two. He had brownish-red hair, cut short, with a 'side-swept bang' – Sam had explained to me what this was. His face was full of youth, and his skin was pale. His eyes were unnaturally wide, and a sweet brown color, with strangely long eyelashes.

And the other half of the couple, the person tangled in this young man's arms?

Sam Winchester.

Both young men looked back at me with utter shock on their faces. I'm sure I looked much the same as them.

"Sam?" I asked tentatively.

Sam looked at the young man, fear on his face. The young man smiled comfortingly at him, brushed a lock of his hair back fondly, and nodded. Sam sighed, and turned to face me.

"Uh, hi, Cas…"

I wasn't quite sure how to respond. I am well aware that people of the same sex can be together, and I have no objections against it. I just never thought Sam was like that.

Sam gave a nervous chuckle, and ran a hand through his hair.

"Ah, you're probably confused or angry or weirded out or something, but I can explain." he said hurriedly.

I frowned. "Sam. I'm not angry or 'weireded out' at all. Surprised, yes, but, if you, ah, like men, then, that's fine. There's nothing wrong with it, not at all."

Sam gave me a weak smile. "Thanks Cas. I know it's, surprising, like you said, for you. I, ah, hid it well. See-"

Just then, a great rustling came from the bushes, coupled with much cussing and cursing. And out popped Dean.

"Fucking bushes, why can't you guys have been in a more convenient spot? Heard your voices and decided to follow in. Sam, what's the big –"

Dean had been worrying over his clothes, brushing them off, and pulling various branches and leaves out of his hair and face. When he looked up, he saw the very same scene I walked into.

"-Surprise." he finished, his voice sounding hollow.

If Sam had looked scared when I came in, he looked as though he would faint right now. The young man, still in his arms, turned Sam's face to meet his own. He gave him an encouraging smile, and rubbed his cheek affectionately. Sam took a deep breath, and turned to face Dean, keeping one arm around the young man's waist.

"Hi Dean. I know what you're thinking. 'I don't like this', 'this isn't happening', 'you aren't a real man', 'what the fuck', yada yada." Sam seemed to steel himself. "But that's ok. I don't really care what you think in this particular case. Dean, I am bi-sexual."

Ah, so that means he likes men and women, right? "I know you don't like it, but that's ok. Everyone has their own opinions. But I have been like this for a while now, and have found it to be a part of who I really am. I have had to suppress it for so long, around you, afraid of your reaction. But now, I want you to know the whole truth." He turned to the young man, holding one of his hands firmly in his own. "This is Marcus Twist, and Dean, Castiel, I-I," he gulped visibly, stammering the entire time, "I think I'm in l-love with him." The young man blushed, and leaned into Sam's shoulder, watching him with adoring eyes. Sam gave him an equally adoring smile back, then returned to Dena and I. "I know this is a shock to you both, but Marcus and I have been talking for over a year now, and we visit each other every chance we get, between our jobs. I know this might be difficult for you, and I'm not going to ask you to like it; just, try to understand, and respect me and my feelings, and the people I love. I'm the same Sam, I swear. I just, like guys along with chicks." He let out a long breath. "Wow, I've wanted to say that for so long." He sounded as though the greatest weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

I gave the couple a smile; a real smile. I was happy two people had found each other, had found love, despite difficulties, and were able to be together. True, it brought a sharp pang of hurt to my own lonely heart, but, for now, I was content to see Sam so happy.

Dean had been frozen the entire time Sam had spoken. His face had betrayed the exact thoughts Sam had said Dean would be thinking. Dean's eyes narrowed, and he looked from Marcus, to Sam, and back to Marcus. He must have seen something there, because his face softened incredibly, and he sighed.

"Alright Sam. I see it. I see the looks you too have; it's the same one I see when my fiancée looks at me, and surely the same one I have when I look at her. I don't really understand, but, I can respect you Sam, for being brave and not letting me give you shit." He sent the two a soft smile. "And I really am happy you're happy Sam. You should know that, as my brother, if you're happy - no matter what I think - I'm happy."

Marcus sniffled, and exclaimed in a higher pitched, 'adorable', voice, "Oh my _gosh_ this is all just sooo happy!" Marcus jumped up, and threw his arms around Dean, then around me. We both patted him on the back, not sure what else to do. Sam too got up, and, slightly teary eyes, embraced his brother. Dean hesitated, then hugged him back fiercely.

The two broke apart after a minute, shuffling and looking around, avoiding each other's eyes. Dean cleared his throat, and said, "Ok, enough sappy shit from Sam. Cas, how'd it go?"

I sighed. "Please. Let's just leave…"

The more I saw of Sam and Marcus – the utter happiness, love, and bliss – the deeper into melancholy and depression I could feel myself falling. I hadn't found the one. I probably would _never_ find 'the one'.

Marcus' happy face fell. He let go of Sam's hand he had been holding, and came over to me. He put both hands on my shoulders and looked me straight in the eye.

"Listen to me Cas. I know it seems like right now, that no one in the entire world will love you, that you will be alone forever, that you will never have what I have with Sam. I know. I've been there. I never would have imagined in a thousand years that I would be here, utterly happy with the one I was meant to be with. If someone had told me my someone was waiting for me at a paralegal convention I was going to on a dare, I would tell them to get off whatever alcohol or drugs they were on and try talking to me later. _But I did find him!_ _Don't_ give up hope Cas! It _will_ work out eventually; she – or he! – will come to you eventually. And you won't be alone anymore." He gave me a sincere, hopeful smile, then went back to Sam. The two entwined in a loving embrace.

"I suppose I have to give you back, to help Cas." Marcus said wistfully.

Sam sighed. "I will be back for you as soon as we find Cas' girl; I'm taking you home with me this time; no more separation for us."

Marcus' face light up like a thousand candles. He squealed happily, and kissed Sam passionately. Dean and I looked away, feeling like intruders in this intimate scene.

"Oh Sam! Hurry back! I can't wait to go to Massachusetts with you, and finally be able to talk to you every day in person, not just over the phone or chat!" Marcus leaned up, and whispered something into Sam's ear that made him chuckle darkly. He in turn leaned into Marcus' ear and whispered something that made Marcus' face turn the shade of a ripened tomato. The two shared one last lingering kiss, and Marcus turned to leave. He waved to Dean and me, eagerly. "Nice to finally have met you two!" He turned, and ducked through the bushes, leaving us.

Sam watched after him till he was gone, and sighed. He gave each of us an abashed smile, and came over to me.

"So, Cas."

I waited for him to continue.

"Yes, Sam?"

"How'd it go? You gotta tell me everything! I thought I did well with this one!"

I sighed, and told Sam and Dean the entire story.

They were speechless.

Then Dean laughed hysterically.

"Oh god Cas, you just have the shittiest luck with women, don't you? And Sam! It was all your fault this time! You were all, 'This is totally gonna be it, she'll be perfect!'" He howled with laughter.

Sam sent the strongest glare I have ever seen from him in Dean's direction. Dean actually froze, and shifted uncomfortably, looking anywhere but Sam. When Sam just continued to glare, Dean shrunk back a little, shuffling uneasily.

"Dude! Cut it with that glare! That shit is actually kinda terrifying…"

"Good." Sam spat out from tightly ground teeth. "I've tried so hard for Cas, and it was ruined. Yet again." He huffed, and turned sad eyes on me. I cleared my throat, and looked away from him; I knew he was going to start on another speech, that I didn't want to hear right now, about 'poor Cas', 'lonely Cas', 'unfortunate Cas', and such.

"Cas, I know you don't really want to hear this right now, but you gotta listen." Sam said imploringly.

I sighed, and looked at him, stiff and almost as uncomfortable as Dean had been minutes ago.

"Yes Sam?"

Sam gave me a little smile. "Ok Cas, you know we love you like a brother, the both of us." Dean nodded his agreement. "So, you know we want this just as bad as you do." I raised an incredulous brow. Sam gave an awkward laugh. "Um, ok, maybe not as bad as you do, but pretty close. We want _so badly_ for you to be happy Cas. With everything the three of us have been through, the very least we all deserve is _happiness_. Dean has his. I have mine. We want you to have yours. We are trying so hard. And _it will happen._ I need you to know this, to not give up. I know with all the years going by, that it might seem hopeless. But it never is, ok? We'll find her, I _swear_." Sam's last words, his promise to me, was spoken so fiercely, I didn't doubt him and his ability to find _her._

For about a minute.

But still, I could see the fierce looks on the brother's faces; the utter determination, and hope. All that I didn't have anymore. I gave them a tiny, tiny smile.

"Thank you. You boys have no idea what this means to me." My voice was quiet, muted under all the growing hopelessness, loneliness, and the rare show of deep affection from the boys.

Dean grinned, breaking the serious and deep moment. "That'a boy Cas! We'll get your girl, don't you worry! So, let's get going now, no more wasting time!"

Sam nodded enthusiastically, already running ahead of us toward the Impala. When Dean and I didn't follow right away, he turned around, and put a hand on his hip. He huffed, and impatiently called, "Uh, hello? We're going _now_; please move your asses with some _urgency_! No more wasting time, remember?"

Dean and I looked at one another, and Dean shook his head, grinning. I felt the corners of my mouth tugging upwards, happy to see Sam so light and happy, and that the three of us were even closer, despite Sam's surprising news earlier.

Dean jogged forward, laughing, and whizzed by Sam.

"Race ya!" he hollered over his shoulder, full out running to the Impala now.

Sam gasped, and stomped his foot before he began running too. "Bitch! You cheat!"

"Jerk! You're slow!" Dean yelled.

I chuckled shortly, and decided to join their race.

The boys got out of the park, bursting through the trees, neck in neck. They kept darting glances at each other, pushing faster and faster to win. They both skidded to a halt in front of the Impala, shouting in victory, gasping for breath. Then they began arguing over who had won. They turned around, expecting to see me behind them, no doubt to ask me to settle the matter.

The boys heard a quiet chuckle, and whipped around.

I was sitting in the back seat of the Impala, ready to go.

"I do believe I won this race." I mused.

Dean and Sam looked at each other, disappointment on their faces.

"Cheater." They muttered at the same time.

I simply gave a small grin back, and shrugged.

"Ready to go, losers?"

* * *

**Author's Note: Wow! **This was a very long chapter; twelve pages on Word! It still shouldn't have taken me this long again, but, at least I kinda have an excuse this time. x)  
Still looking for a Beta, if anyone is interested. :)  
Love you all very much for the reviews; but send me more! I want lots more reviews, they make me oh so happy! 3

So, this chapter was quite the interesting one. Those two women were... Scary as shit. Imagine having that happen to you? *Shudder* And, the big news with Sam. Now, I know some of you have been wondering about Sam in this FanFic, and some of you are probably going 'wtf'? Let me explain: 1) This is FanFICTION; I can do what I please with my story. 2) I always thought Sam could swing either way in the actual series, and wanted to give him that freedom in my story. 3) I wanted to add a bit of cuteness, a bit of love, and a bit of familial wonderment. 4) I fully support all members of the LGBT community, and wish everyone would; not everyone has to like it, but people should be able to love whoever they want, however they want without ridicule, bullying, etc. If you have a problem with this, go read a different story.

**Recommendations: **  
Song- 'Smokescreen' by Willis  
Book- 'Dearly, Departed' by Lia Habel  
Film - 'This Means War' FUNNIEST romantic comedyb you will EVER see, I promise!


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